Last minute Larry.

If I knew then what I know now.

Photo by Nathan Dumlao on Unsplash

My thesis is due tomorrow.

After four years of study, including two years online, four or five assignments every term, and every one of those left till the last minute.

Procrastinating, overanalyzing, changing, rewriting, formatting, and filling myself with self-doubt right up to the wire before hitting that submit button.

The college group chat each term was a huge help, and thanks to those guys involved, we got through each assignment, adding value and tips to one another.

Without them, I am sure I'd have struggled even more.

And after each submission for three years, we all stated that we would not put ourselves under that deadline to finish the next one, but we did.

So why am I writing this newsletter today when I could perfect my final piece of college work?

It is because I have it submitted, released, and let go of it over a week ago.

I did all I could with it, and I was proud of what I had done and felt I could do no more with it.

I promised myself I would not fill myself with dread and anxiety leading up to the deadline, and I put in the work over the last few months to allow that to happen.

So what has that to do with anything?

You see, there is no time limit in healing or self-development. See, we all may know what we need to do, decisions that need to be made steps that we may need to take, yet we refuse to do them.

Conversations we put off, toxic relationships we need to leave or distance ourselves from, jobs we may need to change, apologies we need to make, and behaviours and habits we need to stop.

Be it out of fear, self-doubt, procrastinating, or putting other things ahead of doing the things that make us uncomfortable.

So for my final year, I was prepared to change that, and I decided to sacrifice a lot to get the uncomfortable stuff done.

The college group chat was muted, archived, and silenced (boundaries) to give me space to work on my piece for a thesis. Our work, our ideas, and as much as others' ideas and input are welcomed for guidance.

It can also throw you.

It can change your views and beliefs and interfere with your flow.

Make you doubt yourself, bring out that inner critic, and panic.

Once you make that decision, you find yourself in your zone.

The old saying if only I knew, then what I know now comes to mind.

On reflection, I wish I had applied that same mentality from the start four years ago, but the past is something we cannot get back, but we can use our new experiences and this knowledge for the future.

Just like with all the lessons we encounter in life through relationships and experiences.

Being kind to yourself provides Growth.

And Growth also happens with awareness.

Awareness of what worked and what didn't, and ensuring we make the right choices and take the correct steps as we advance.

What works for us may not work for others, for they may experience different outcomes.

So what steps we each take can only give the desired clarity and results.

What steps will you take this week to bring peace of mind and calm?

As always, thanks for reading.

Marcus.