Who even am I?

Or who are you, for that matter?

Photo by Felicia Buitenwerf on Unsplash

If someone was to ask who are you?

Even better, have you ever asked yourself that very question?

And if so, then what is your answer?

Would your reply be your name? Your age, and what you do for a living?

But is that really who you are?

How often have we looked closely at our personality on this "journey" we call personal development? The stuff we hold close to us, our values, our beliefs, how we like to see ourselves?

And is that how others see us?

If we are lucky to take that risk in becoming who we are,

we will experience different personalities or traits in life, but all of this is important in discovering our true selves.

And once we find that out, it brings a sense of calmness and a feeling only those who have found it can describe.

Trauma, hurt, loss and grief also shape us into our newfound selves.

When we experience the above, we think it would be easier to return to the way we were, but these moments make it impossible to return to that old you. The past remains a memory.

Life moves on, and although the experiences that happen to us may seem the same as in the past, they are different, for we learn to make better choices, which will allow the outcome to be different and bring a better future for the choices we make.

And in this, personal growth is neverending, and there is no race to see who finishes first; the is no finish line, for the true winners are those who understand this.

Those who compare themselves to others or be hard on themselves for their lives not being how they had wished for are most likely the ones who would say they are kind people.

Yet can not give that kindness to themselves.

"comparison is the thief of joy," a quote so accurate for as long as we compare ourselves to others or how we had it played out in our head, and it takes away all that we have right now, in this very moment.

Let go of expectations, for they make you believe in a story about how it should happen before it happens.

For we cannot predict the future, however the best way to predict the future is to create it (I have it tattoed on my arm as a reminder)

And creating that future starts by making intentions on the things we desire, without the pressure, allowing a flow and room for growth as each experience unfolds.

The adventure in discovering who you are is your adventure.

It is a lonely journey, at times, often losing friends and people along the way. I'm afraid I have to disagree with the saying (usually from a close friend or parent), "it is their loss," it is possibly the ego speaking if we think this. Still, another way to look at it is your gain, which clarifies the type of people you wish to surround yourself with.

Being yourself without judgment from others contributes to being your true self.

You will often rediscover yourself, a new trait you were unaware of, or perhaps an old habit resurfacing.

Appreciate the needs that you desire, and respect them without shame.

Learn to speak to yourself more kindly and, in turn, not settle for less when with others.

Understanding this requires time and patience. This awareness is usually hidden until we experience hurt and pain, forcing us to reevaluate those habits that have led us to the pain.

To experience joy is beautiful, so when we find the things or people who help provide that, well then I say do those things often and surround yourself with only those.

Yes, this journey is unique and down to us as individuals, but to feel total freedom in the person you indeed are is all that matters.

The courage that you show to leave the things that do not serve you anymore is the courage that will lead you to what is.

So if you see yourself as fun, have some fun. Or if you think you are kind. Please show the same kindness to yourself, trustworthy? Then trust in how you are feeling or made feel in all areas of your life.

Honest, caring, driven, dependable, motivated, compassionate, passionate, or happy, then do all these for yourself, not others.

That is when you can say you are being your true self.

Who we were in the past was who we needed to be to get us to where we are right now. It got you here.

To use another saying, "never look back only to see how far you have come."

Now ask yourself, who are you?

As always, thanks for reading,

Marcus.